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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23447395">The Secret Files of Humanity</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chigger/pseuds/Chigger'>Chigger</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Humanity - Splatoon [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Splatoon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Splatoon - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 13:54:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>894</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23447395</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chigger/pseuds/Chigger</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What really went on during the two years of peace has now been declassified. What happens when an Octoling can no longer wait.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Humanity - Splatoon [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/706503</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Secret Files of Humanity</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The lost file</p><p>It's been over a year since the fall of Octavio and the destruction of the Tentatek militia that formed TheChaos. While things were finally peaceful between the Inklings and the Octarians, as well as the Elder Race as the humans were called. Since tensions had calmed down, there was still a highly contested subject between all three groups. A subject that was very taboo.</p><p>"Ita still been a year and we have to hide things..." Drake said with a deep sigh. "At this rate we'll never even be allowed to display affection in public.." he finished typing the rest of his daily report when he heard a knock at the door. "I swear, that better not be another incident.." getting off of his chair, he headed to the door, and slowly opened it. His eyes went wide when I saw the figure standing in front of him.</p><p>"H-hey..." Otome stoos in front of him with a red face. He could clearly see that the Octoling girl had prepared for this visit. Her face had had cosmetics applied to it, likely courtesy of the squid sisters. Her outfit also looked more revealing. The shorts were shorter, and the tank top barely covered her chest, as none could see below the chest armor. "I-its Yako's old uniform.. I thought.. you might like."</p><p>"Y-yeah just come in already" The OctiIng obliged and he quickly shut the door before others could see her. "Otome, I'm glad you're here but what-"</p><p>"Shhhh..." Otome quickly covered his mouth with her own. Startled, the human didnt react to the surprise kiss at first, but quickly started kissing bac . The two parted for a brief moment, before pressing to eachother again. Passionately exchanging kisses, the two wrapped the arms around eachother as they made out. Then Otome slowly pulled away.</p><p>"That was quite a rush. A nice one though" Drake said with a grin.</p><p>"I-I, yes.. but.." the Octoling took a step back. The grin on his face dropped when he heard the clank of her chest plate hitting the floor, leaving only the short tank top that barely covered her chest. "Drake... I cant take it anymore. If we cant become life partners.. I need... you..." Blushing like mad, she removed the tank top.</p><p>"O-Otome.. you're.." wasting no time, the human moved up to her, and went for her exposed perky breasts-"</p><p>"Wait, whhhhhhaaaattt?" Shouting in surprise, Marie glanced up from the paper that she had been reading from. Callie was sitting across from her, grinning. Shara was laying on the ground in a T-pose with a blank expression, and Levin was sitting in a chair while drooling with his eyes closed. Otome looked blooed shot and Drake was doing everything he could to hold her back From strangling Callie.</p><p>"Sooo... what did you think?" Callie asked with a seemingly innocent expression. Marie glanced at her, then back at the paper</p><p>"This... this is not okay. This needs to stop, now. This is cancer. This is so much cancer, that I can feel the tumors growing on my back. And its weighing down heavily in me, and it's not okay. Can you help a woomy out and just stop this? Please?" Marie's got up from the table, setting the papers down</p><p>"W-what?" Callie had an expression of shock. "B-but I thought that getting people to like a story about them would get them to be accepted-"</p><p>"Just stop it. Stop. No, just stop it." Marie said, and stormed into the the prop storage room. Callie looked down in embarrassment.</p><p>"Callie, where did you even get that idea?" Drake asked, continuing to hold the enraged Octoling back.</p><p>"T-tanner said I should write-"</p><p>Tanner..." Otome stopped struggling and instantly lost any hostility towards the inkling and sighed deeply. "He is so dead when I get back to the vally.. Callie, I've said it before but never listen to anything he says. That's not gonna work. I... do appreciate that you were trying to help though- and-" before Otome Finished, Marie came back out, holding a giant clock they used as a prop.</p><p>"Its time to STOP! It's time to stop, okay? No more. Where the fuck are our parents? I'm gonna call woony protective services. It's time to stop!"</p><p>"Okay Marie, you-" Drake started to say, but the green and white girl turned to the screen and startled rambling.</p><p>"You need to stop everything. Look at you! Sitting in front of a computer. With cheetos crumbs all over your fucking shirt! Your dirt! You're disgusting! You're fucking sick. Fuck you... I'm gonna shoot your dad in the mouth. With a blaster. Sawed off-"</p><p>"Okay, Marie. That's enough " Drake lifted Marie into his arms, bridal style. She let out a yelp, coming back to her senses. She then buried her face into his chest and started crying</p><p>"Its time to stop it's time to stop. I'm sorry mom..." he then carried her over to the bed and layed her down.</p><p>"I think I screwed up...</p><p>
  <strong>A/N so me thinking I had more time to write, well the office decided to handle the virus in a very stupid way, so I now have no time for the next month. Barely got this put and its still a day late April fools joke. No idea when the next real chapter is out </strong>
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